Be yourself, everyone else is already taken. ~ Oscar Wilde
Once upon a time, I relied on approval and gratification from others in order to make everyday decisions. My social calendar was filled with activities and events I needed to attend in order to make someone other than myself happy. Instead of focusing on how a decision made me feel, I instead focused only on the reaction of others. I totally lost sight of myself and my own personal desires, and was completely consumed in doing what I thought would please others.
Then I woke up one day and thought to myself, why am I making these plans when I am not having fun? I deserve to have fun. I deserve to be me, without fear of disapproval. F*ck this.
And then I changed my whole life.
It was like a pot I didn’t know was on the burner had boiled over, and I had an epiphany. Happiness isn’t a disposition we are in by default. We must choose it. So, after realizing this – and subsequently realizing I had been choosing a life of selflessness and misery – I began to change my ways. And I am totally comfortable in my own skin and my life is more fulfilling than ever!
For some of you reading this, you may think that I am bat shit crazy and of course I was miserable, who does that? Hopefully the rest have you have been in my shoes before and know now that the choice to be happy isn’t always very obvious and sometimes we have to clear a lot of shit out of the way to be able to see it. And this can take time. And energy. And cost you relationships. And loved ones. But when one door closes, another door opens, and more room is created for the positive things and people in your life instead of those that no longer serve you.
So I encourage you to be selfish, and skip the invites that don’t seem like your cup of tea. Because you only live once, and why waste any of your time on others if you are not being fulfilled? Do you! And those that feel your positive light will gravitate towards you naturally.
Have a wonderful weekend and let that light shine!